Hello
everyone.
My name
is Faith, and I am lazy and a professional
procrastinator.
Here is
my story:
I have
had this problem almost all my life, and it is something I am ashamed of. My
procrastination is so bad, and I feel it ruining my life, little by little. I
have harbored this behavior and it in only recently that I realized I need
help, after denying for so long.
procrastinate
v. delay or
postpone action.lazy
adj. (lazier,
laziest)1
unwilling to work or use energy.2 showing
a lack of effort or care.
It has
taken me so many days to actually write this post, because- you guessed right- procrastination. I would gain some energy and I would promise myself I
would write, but procrastination held on to me so tightly and wouldn’t let go.
Then the cousin, Sleep, would show up and take over.
Here’s
how bad my procrastination is, an example of a typical week day- I
wake up in the morning with all intentions to be early for my lecture, to leave
my room spick and span, and to have all my learning and study materials
organized. The alarm buzzes, and you know I’ll be all up on that snooze button,
convincing myself I need extra minutes of sleep (I set more than 2 alarms,
minutes apart, because one alarm is not enough). When I finally win the battle
with sleep, and I wake up, best believe I’m gonna caress my bed, sliding my
hand underneath my pillow, looking for my mobile phone.
I start
with Whatsapp, and answer all the good morning’s and apologize to some souls I
fell asleep on the night before. Facebook, another good friend of laziness and
procrastination, demands to be opened and scrolled too. Instagram. Twitter. My zillion mail boxes. All
demanding my attention. I watch myself satisfy their need for attention.
“Just one
more scroll,” I lie to myself.
The clock
ticks away.
As I go
to my homepage, I notice the game Candy Crash staring so sweetly at me,
whispering, “Open me… just play one game, to wake yourself up.”
“But I
have a class soon and I want to be early today…”
Too late,
my finger has already tapped the icon. It gets me. EVERY. TIME.
“OK, just
one game and I’ll start my day.”
.
.
.
.
.
10
minutes later, I lay in bed, staring at my phone, wondering how in the world
one game could possibly lead me to waste so much time. The only thing that
jolts me back to reality is the game telling me I have run out of lives. I
scorn myself inside. I assure myself I have enough time to get ready for my
lecture. I jump out of bed and try to do the things I was supposed to do in 2
hours in 30 minutes. Nope, I’m late for my lecture again. And instead of
running, like the rest of the late students that I’m guessing hit the snooze
button as much as me, I walk like I’m the president. I have sometimes gone as
far as having coffee on my way to class because I was too late to sit down and
have my breakfast (I ain’t about that skipping breakfast life. This girl needs
to EAT!). I walk into the lecture room, late as ever. Unfortunately, I sit in
front, and I feel eyes stare at me and judge me for being so late. I bet they
are used to that, though. Fai is almost always late.
I sit
down. I fumble with my bag, trying to find a pen and my notebook. I glance at
my neighbor to find out how much space I have to skip to copy what I missed,
all because I wanted to get over a level on candy crash and have 20 more
minutes of undeserved sleep.
I kid you
not, I have a very big laziness problem. It has gone out of hand. I need help :(.
I am not
a study-in-the-afternoon person, at all! I am the kind that turns into a potato
after I have my lunch. So Sleep comes in again, and takes total control of my
body (I hear blood flows to your stomach to digest the big meal you just had,
and leaves little blood in your brain, which then makes you drowsy). So I
always have a nap after my lunch, because if I don’t, I will be a walking
zombie. Some people have told me that ndinazizolowetsa
zoipa, and I can train myself to be attentive and active after lunch. But
at the moment, what I know is, I simply cannot do anything productive after
lunch until I get a nap.
Buuuut,
the problem with me is that when I nap and I set the alarm and all, I will
still hit that snooze button and convince myself I still need a little more sleep if I am to be productive (be it an
afternoon class, or a study session). So
a 30 minute nap easily turns into a 2 hour nap *hides*
I really need help, don’t I?
Well, it
doesn’t stop there. Procrastination is a very clever thing, you guys. I am the
kind that writes everything down, from shopping lists to exam dates; I know I
have a bad memory, so I jot everything down. When my hardworking spirit decides
to show up, I make a list of all the topics I have to cover, and sometimes I go
as far as writing a ‘mini timetable’ to track my progress and set a dateline
for myself. This is where I postpone like crazy and I have this beautiful
illusion that “I still have more time”. I will then cram myself with ALLLL the
topics I was supposed to study in a week, to 2 nights before a test. This is
when hardworking spirit shows up again, mixed with panic, and I study like
crazy, as I despise myself inside. Same goes for assignments. I will keep on
staring at my assignment, for days on end, until the due date has fast
approached, then I will do my research and work like an ant to get it submitted
before the time indicated.
My
procrastination problem needs to be addressed. I have kept this to myself for
far too long. I need help :(.
I always
tell my friends that, in some weird way, procrastination makes me work extra
hard… I don’t know about you, but sometimes I get the best results when I’m
working under pressure. It makes me so efficient. That panicky feeling actually
does help most times, because it is at this point when I realize I may actually
FAIL and I start to think back to all the wasted time on the interwebs or
sleeping away precious time.
But I
don’t want to be a procrastinator anymore. I have a loooot of stories to tell
about what procrastination has done to me, but I’m sure you have sympathized
with me enough, and you are probably feeling sorry for lazy, silly me (or
relating with me).
Thing is,
I know I’m not the only one. I have, on several occasions, sought help from
friends and I told them about my procrastination problem, and they all laughed
and said “me toooooo! It’s everyone though, so don’t worry about it!” But just
because we are a people that loves sleep, and isn’t punctual or puts off things
to the last minute, does it make it ok? Should we say “There is strength in numbers”?
First of
all, I assure myself that, “well I’m in third year, I haven’t been weeded yet,
so maybe I should accept that this is how things are going to be all my life…”
I mean, it works, somehow, right? My grades haven’t been THAT BAD, so maybe
procrastination is something I should welcome into my life, let it make itself
comfortable and accept it as a part of my little home.
Let’s
turn to the bible to see what it says about laziness (aka sloth or slug).
Prov 26: 14:
[As] the door turneth upon its hinges, so
doth the sluggard upon his bed.
(This verse is so me. Especially when am
turning in bed so I can have the perfect position to be on my phone).
Proverbs
6: 6-11: Go to the ant, thou sluggard;
Consider her ways, and be wise: Which having no chief, Overseer, or ruler,
provideth her bread in the summer, And gathereth her food in the harvest. How
long wilt thou sleep, O sluggard? When wilt thou arise out of thy sleep? [Yet] a little sleep, a little slumber, A
little folding of the hands to sleep: So shall thy poverty come as a
robber, And thy want as an armed man.
*hangs
head in shame*
My
procrastination and laziness problems need to be addressed! ASAP! It’s like
those verses were written FOR me! I honestly didn’t know the Bible clearly
describes my behavior until I searched for “slug” just now and this showed up.
This is just too close to the skin :’(.
So yes,
there needs to be a change. What has finally made me realize how bad my
procrastination is was how hectic this semester has been. I thought, “I’ll do
what I’ve been doing in the past years, and I’ll still get good grades.” I had
a rude awakening! This semester has been particularly hard for me. I continued
to employ my “work-hard-last-minute” tactic and it hasn’t been as successful. I
remember once during this semester, I procrastinated so bad, I had due dates
and tests coming up and I was BEHIND! Sooo behind! I panicked like never
before. But instead of facing my fears head on, I literally wanted to RUN! Run
and come back when everything has fallen apart. I was being so stupid, looking
back, but I know it’s because I have been harboring laziness and it was making
itself at home. Lucky enough, I prayed over it and decided to go to a friend
where I broke down and confessed I have been procrastinating for too long and
that I felt like I am a failure. Well, friends are there to help you pick up
the pieces, so we cleaned that mess and started a crash course on all the
things I had missed out. I did pass that test, but I know I never wanna get in
that position again and I know I could have done better.
Which
brings me to my next point; I know procrastinators like me could do better if
we didn’t put things off so much. I know this because if we manage to study
last minute and pass, or do an assignment in less than 24 hours, how much
better could we get if we thoroughly studied, made use of all the extra time we
had and peacefully studied for an exam? We have so much potential, but we limit
ourselves because we let laziness come to stay.
I took
the liberty of asking a certain yaza
who is a constant on the Dean’s list, to see what kind of pattern he has and
how he manages his time. One of my lecturers once said that people who get excellent grades usually don’t get them by chance or luck, they have a certain pattern
that makes them excel. First of all, this person knows which time he is
efficient and maximizes this time, which to him, is late at night. Secondly, he
never lets the times he is not effective go to waste, but solves math (I weeped
a little here, I don’t know if I can manage that kind of dedication) and
studies even if he has no test or assignment coming up. Another notable thing
is that he too, naps (yay! We are the same here!) But he says he only naps for
30 minutes, because naps longer than an hour will lead you to “serious sleep”
(which makes sense! This is why I hit the snooze button so hard). He also said
he asks himself what he wants to achieve… no, not short term goals, those HUGE
dreams we have, and having that in mind always motivates him to keep pushing
forward.
Of course
we are all different and we can’t have the same pattern. But the main point is
to know yourself and adjust accordingly. Some people work best early in the
morning; some late at night; some right after lunch (special applause to
those), and it is best to maximize this time. Another thing is not to be too
hard on yourself, rest a little after a test, give yourselves a break and try
to have little rewards waiting for you after a long and productive study
session. Of course I know all this is theory and actually doing these things is
a whole other story. That part needs to be self-will; something one has to
decide to follow up on their own i.e. self discipline.
As
Christians, the Bible condemns laziness and clearly says “a little folding of
the hands to sleep: So shall thy poverty come as a robber”. Yes, being lazy can lead you to POVERTY. We all need to be a
little more serious with whatever occupation we are in; be more punctual, more
hardworking, learn self-discipline and, most importantly, PUT OUR PHONES AWAY
WHEN WE HAVE TO (the people in your phone will understand if you tell them you
have to work or study, trust me). It’s hard, yes, but it is very possible.
That is
my story, and I am hereby getting myself help to get rid of my nasty habit. So
help me God.
-Romans 7: 15-25 For I don’t know what I am
doing. For I don’t practice what I desire to do; but what I hate, that I do. But
if what I don’t desire, that I do, I consent to the law that it is good. So now
it is no more I that do it, but sin which dwells in me. For I know that in me,
that is, in my flesh, dwells no good thing. For desire is present with me, but
I don’t find it doing that which is good. For the good which I desire, I don’t
do; but the evil which I don’t desire, that I practice. For I delight in God’s law after the inward
man, but I see a different law in my members, warring against the law of my
mind, and bringing me into captivity under the law of sin which is in my
members. What a wretched man I am! Who will deliver me out of the body of this
death? I thank God through Jesus Christ, our Lord! So then with the mind, I
myself serve God’s law, but with the flesh, the sin’s law.